Comedy //


Peter ‘Fitzy’ Fitzsimons on rugby, the youth of today, and his candidature in the USYD Senate elections


Hello everyone, here are some thoughts I had this week on higher education. Oh, by the way, I’m running for Senate of the University of Sydney, along with Verity Firth, Jane Spring, Peter King and Bruce McWilliam on the Unify ticket and alumni of the University can vote via postal vote.

We should be giving out more elite athlete scholarships. Blokes who like sport deserve to be recognised in the University community. And women who like sport too. I’m a feminist, and so women should be able to play sports if they want to. Jane Spring is a pretty tops sportswoman, being a champion wheelchair basketball player. Verity Firth is probably pretty tops at sports too. I’m running for the University of Sydney Senate with the two of them. Alumni of the University can vote via postal vote.

But that’s enough of that! I also think the University needs to expand its media degrees. The media is super important. As well as occasionally contributing to The Soin I also write for the Herald and also I write books. Would you consider buying my latest one? It’s $19.95 and available at all good bookstores and is on a topic relevant to Australian culture and of appeal to the common man. We should be placing more emphasis on the role of the media, like TV and Twitter. Malcolm Turnbull is very popular at the moment because he is good at using Twitter. The Wallabies need to try harder. Nothing like my day.

And that’s about all from me this week. But don’t forget: more sports and more media at University. That stuff is really important. So, without wanting to turn this column into blatant propaganda, if you’re a Sydney Uni alumnus, don’t forget to vote for Unify!

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