Comedy //

The Rise of Immature Age Students

Victoria Zerbst is a baby.

Earlier this year, The University of Sydney inaugurated the Immature Age Entry Scheme, which gives people of three years of age or younger an avenue of enrolment into the University.

Despite the controversy, the Vice-Chancellor defended the scheme stating that “age should not be a discriminating factor in the enrolment process”.

Since February, the University has admitted at least 500 infants into degrees ranging from medicine to resource management.

However, this new intake has not been without criticism. Students and lecturers alike have been complaining that immature age students disrupt lectures with “moronic questions and unnecessary comments.”

There have also been reports of tutorials facing disturbances such as “loud whining, tantrums and students spitting up food”.

When asked to comment, one immature age student gave an inaudible gurgle and began sucking her own toes.

The Vice-Chancellor also failed to respond to these challenges, as he too appeared to be sucking his own toes.