Comedy //

Fine Arts Student “Bangs Shit Together”, Creates Internet

Yi Jian Ching sometimes just bangs shit together.

A Fine Arts Student from the University of Sydney has mistakenly developed a new, revolutionary technology which can deliver a range of broadband services faster and cheaper than the NBN ever could. Justin Blacksack, whose apparatus consists of two clothes hangers and a Milo tin, apparently made this miraculous mistake while working on a mid-semester project.

After reportedly “just banging shit together” near the University of Sydney’s Wallace Theatre, Blacksack noticed that he actually managed to access the Internet, something otherwise deemed unachievable. Now, after testing his device by successfully torrenting a season’s worth of Game of Thrones, Justin plans to enter negotiations with NBN officials to implement his device across Australia.

And it couldn’t have come at a better time; whereas the cost effectiveness of the current NBN scheme is a controversial $30 billion, Justin’s device, which provides Wi-Fi services within a hundred kilometre radius, would be roughly 109890109790.1099% cheaper, costing $27.30 to implement across Australia.

Justin isn’t resting on his laurels just yet, however. Despite revolutionising the technology industry and being in line for a Nobel Prize, he admits his device still needs improvement, after adjustments with crayons proved ineffective. He is reportedly researching the effectiveness of GLAD wrap.

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