Comedy //

Paramount Announces 2014 Director’s Cut Of Braveheart

By Bennett Sheldon.

“They can take our lives, but they can also take our currency and leave us with billions in debt” murmured Mel Gibson’s William Wallace, self doubtingly. In the most recent release of the film, the Scottish forces put in a good innings, but ultimately decide that freedom isn’t for them.

In over fourteen hours of never before seen footage, Wallace is informed that it isn’t really his place to make decisions such as rebellion on behalf of an entire group of people, and so after a lengthy surveying process concludes that this very moment just isn’t the right time to secede, he is told: “Every man dies, not every man has a passport for all of Britain.”

Whilst influential groups did push strongly for the military resistance, Wallace was able to point out that Scotland doesn’t actually have a military of its own, and in fact would be relying on combined British forces. With that in mind, the abundance of blue face paint available lost some of its previously motivational qualities.

Director, producer, lead actor, and historically racially sensitive Gibson has stated in interviews that this is the film that he always wanted to make, as it perfectly balances inspirational hope and longing for freedom, with a well-thought-out sensibility that is all too often missing in the Hollywood era of reckless driving and frivolous use of highly dangerous firearms and marijuanas.

“We all end up dead, it’s just a question of how and when… and how many medals we can get at the Olympics in that time, and whether the per capita accomplishment of going as an independent country would trump the grand total of going as a part of Britain!”