Friend’s Funeral Apparently Not Fun, Colourful, Celebration of Life

Arrangements made to commemorate the passing of Andrew Cordela were interrupted this morning by the arrival of a guest wearing a colourful shorts and shirt combination, sources have reported.

“I’m pretty sure he asked for that ‘celebration of life stuff’,” said Clifford Hastings, who had known Cordela for six months at the time of his fatal skiing accident.

“Nah, it’s definitely one of those colour things,” Hastings was overheard saying as he stepped out of the car upon arrival at Beechton Graveyard and Crematorium, populated entirely by friends and family of the deceased in conventional funeral black, despite Hastings adamantly reiterating that Cordela was the sort of “fun guy who would totally do this sort of thing”.

Cordela’s family suggested that the swiftness of their brother, son and friend’s passing had precluded him from making the ceremony the “sweet sendoff” that Hastings maintains he would’ve wanted.

“A lot of people here don’t know Andy like I do. He woulda thought this was a cracker,” Hastings said to Cordela’s grandmother.

Sources report she tried to smile.

Cordela’s actual best friend made three tasteful jokes in a eulogy attendees have described as “moving”, while Hastings loudly borrowed a jacket to cover his Hawaiian shirt.

“Haha, classic,” Hastings muttered at press time.