Comedy //

Cedar Trees Form Blockade to Defy Logging Threat

Rebecca Wong stands firm with the wood

A grove of trees is refusing to vacate the Daintree Rainforest, having set up camp in an area earmarked for clearing by the Queensland Department of Forestry.

According to the department, the standoff arose after the cedars doggedly refused to negotiate, rejecting even the most generous compensation package.

An unnamed department representative stated, “Every time I went to talk terms, they’d just stand silently around me. Never said a word! Damned creepy, to be honest.”

The cedars are being praised for their ‘no dialogue, no compromise’ stance, with environmental groups labelling the protest one of the most symbolically significant grassroots initiatives in recent history.

“They’re really digging in their heels this time,” noted Louis Karminski, a researcher at the Grattan Institute. “They’re drawing on a rich tradition of activists putting their bodies on the line for a cause they’re passionate about.”

A source from within the Queensland Department of Forestry predicts that the impasse is unlikely to last long.

“Eco protestors talk big, but when the chips are down and the chainsaws come out they’ll all scurry back home where they belong.” The cedars could not be reached for comment.