Culture //

FOOD REVIEW: The Laksa on Campus is Clearly Catered To White People. This is Problematic and it NEEDS TO STOP.

Aaron Chen food reviews?

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Art by Brigitte Samaha

You can get a killer laksa on campus at the little café (I forget the name) just past the little bridge you go on to get into the university, if you’re walking from Redfern. The little one near the big green lawn, I’m not sure if it’s called anything. The lawn has those weird art-meets-furniture chairs on it which are comfy to lie down on if you have a class on that side of campus. I haven’t had a class on that side of campus since semester one. I really try to keep all my classes in between Eastern Ave and the Footbridge; this saves me a lot of time and means that I don’t have to rub shoulders with people who eat at Subway. I also get really mad going to that side of campus because I see a heck of a lot more longboards around, and it would bring a tear to Anthony Hawk’s eyes seeing so many longboards around. But I guess he wouldn’t mind too much if there was money in it for him. (Yes, I am trying to say that he’s a corporate sell-out)

But I’m really going on a tangent right now. The café is just near all those science buildings and near the Co-Op. In my frenzy, talking about the lawn, I totally forgot to mention the Co-Op, which is a recognisable and essential utility to most students at USyd (we’ve all got to read books to pass our degrees). And if you don’t already know, you should purchase your books and novellas online before you go into the Co-Op, otherwise you’ll be lining up like a schmuck. One time I walked right past the line because I did exactly this and I felt like one of the biggest celebs like Tom Cruise or Ted Cruz. Everyone of the staff members at the Co-operative loves me because of my forward thinking and preparedness. Nothing can touch me. I am the son of a long line of kings who don’t like to line up in long lines. (Gosh darn, that is the best sentence I ever wrote, frame it Honi Soit). But I digress, the Cafe that I’m talking about is next to the Co-Op. The glassy rice noodles, the spicy yet creamy broth, the prawns and tofu hanging out at the top will all sit nicely on your palate (if you are white!! This is food for white people and needs to stop. MISO HONI MISO HONI MISO HONI MISO HONI)

Thank you.