marigolds and lilies

A poem by DEEPA ALAM

Art: Geneve Bullo

i’ve been showered in marigolds. his eyes light up watching the body in slumber over the cotton, it doesn’t

move for a while. two collared necks call in saying they will miss you, but the rose doesn’t belong to me.

put it in a vase i’ll bleed it out before the week is up

my aeolian mothers shrivelled with the arsenic on their cheeks. she had lead along her waterlines. they say

it’s supposed to make you see further ahead but she left spinning

i just thought she’d really make it, you know? tumi amar sona, you are my gold, you are my precious, my love

                                                                    … the silence that follows keeps ringing

i’m still here btw, splintered mother tongues and all

how dare they

hwo dare the

hhw dae the y

owa h dae htye

my chest splits in two and i’m trying to put it back together. i don’t know, she shouldn’t have left it to me.

her husband looks at me like i am a dirty street dog, but i am trying and there isn’t anyone to help me.

                                                             … so tell me about the human struggle?

fight or flight, sir. the purpose of life is to keep staying alive, but her brain doesn’t work that way so you

can take all of that and just oust it

let me clear my throat before i begin

             you are

             a water lily

             ok

a tenderness brought from a dark place (you brought it onto yourself. you and that stupid brain of yours i

love you). let them give you the murky waters and you can bring out the blossoms