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Dr Chris Brown to put down everyone who went to Bondi last Friday

NSW Premier Gladys Berejiklian has stated Brown “will receive a payment almost as handsome as he is.”

Thousands of beachgoers are to be ‘put to sleep’ after flocking to Bondi last Friday, ignoring calls for social distancing amid the current COVID-19 outbreak.

Dr Chris Brown is set to take some time off from wandering aimlessly around the Network Ten studio to help provide mass euthanasia as part of a live 48-hour telethon edition of Bondi Vet.

“I’m pretty used to handling filthy, slobbering animals, both on Bondi Vet and I’m a Celebrity, Get Me Out of Here, so this is just a typical day at the office for me.”            

Despite initial concerns wide-scale force would have to be employed to round up the beachgoers, almost all of them have willingly turned themselves in, excited at the prospects of getting to be on TV.

“I’ve always wanted to die on the telly. Was hoping it’d be getting shot in a home invasion on Gogglebox, but this’ll do.”

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