Comedy //

New mature age student suddenly very interested in whether you know about any protests coming up

Hello there fellow kids

Chris just wants to ask you a few questions after class...

A recent transfer into your ECOP1001 class, has recently taken a strong interest in whether you’re going to organise any protests soon or maybe have any illegal drugs he can buy.

Chris (who refuses to tell you his last name), 39, clearly fits right into your class of 19-year-old radicals. His Oakley sunglasses, very cool K-Mart jeans and flash walkie talkie has everyone in class wanting to be in his tute presentation group.

Despite being a little older, he’s clearly young at heart, often interjecting in class discussions to say a point is “woke”, “on fleek” or “vape”.

Though only transferring in last week, Chris has already made some important contributions to class discussion. In one discussion about recent police killings in the US, he reminded classmates that actually “police are just doing their jobs” and that “they’re the thin blue line between absolute anarchy”, before adding, after a pause, that of course that’s fine in his book because he is an “antifa anarchist who loves to party.” 

Unlike many classmates, he has really tried to shift discussions about readings to practical organising. He suggested recently that rather than discussing these “commie” readings perhaps students should talk about any plans to protest police repression over a “marijuana cigarette” which he loves because he’s a “total weedhead.”

Though you’re not very close yet, it’s been great that he’s taken an active interest in your life. You’ve recently noticed that he’s started looking over your shoulder in class and noting down the names of all the friends you’ve messaged, probably so he can message them later to find out what sort of gift you’d like for your birthday. 

You’re more than a little pissed off about the ageism from some of your nominally progressive friends in the Education Action Group, who have refused to let him join in meetings. It’s fine though, you’ve just decided at next week’s protest you’ll add him to the Discord group anyway. 

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