Federal Liberals object to Eastern Avenue: “It was Western civilization that built it!”

Minister for Education Dan Tehan, along with his Liberal colleagues, strongly objected to USyd’s premier thoroughfare being named after such an unpatriotic compass direction.

“I think it’s absolutely disgusting that one of Australia’s most prestigious universities has ANYTHING named after our regional rivals.”

Citing national security concerns, Minister Tehan suggested this could be exploited by China in future negotiations.

“We might as well call it Mao’s Boulevard at this point for ScoMo’s sake!”

The Minister was contacted for further information but was sadly attending the annual East Asia Summit and was not available for comment.