Top 5 Emoticons


The wink tongue face combines two much-loved and ubiquitous emoticons into one catchall classic. Feeling saucy? Feeling ironic? Feeling like what you just typed could be grossly misinterpreted and shit is about to get awkward? This face fixes everything. Whack it in at the end of any and all sentences and you’ll come across as equal parts jovial, self-deprecating and smooth.


8====3 – - -

The ejaculating cock and balls is a classy and simple way to express delight or satisfaction. Examples of common usage include: “That Thai was so great last night! 8====3 – - -“ or “Mum! I got a HD in that ethics assignment 8====3 – - -“. Alter the length of the jizz in accordance with how happy you feel. Use freely, and frequently.



The rose is best used to pull chicks. I use it all the time. It’s the frugal modern lover’s answer to real flowers. First date? Send her one of these beforehand, just to get things grooving. Important anniversary? Flick one her way, maybe two. Forget her birthday? Send her a bouquet of them – it can take a while to type, but she’ll love you for it. Romance has never been so easy!



The open vagina is commonly used as an expression of warmth and affection. Where you would ordinarily hug someone, sub in the vagina: “Missing you ({})” or “Sorry you are having a bad day ({})”. For bigger hugs or to inject more warmth into your message, widen the vagina: ( { } ). Sure to cheer up even the saddest of friends.



The Harry Potter is arguably the defining emoticon of our generation. Use it to add a sense of mysticism or magic to your conversations – when someone asks an important or urgent question, answer with HP. Examples include:

Q: “Can you please cover my shift tonight?” A: “(O-O)”.

Q: “What have you done with the cat?” A: “(O-O)”.

Q: “Why am I missing a kidney?” A: “(O-O)”.

Georgia Kriz

Georgia Kriz

Georgia is a second year Arts/Media and Communications student. She has been writing for Honi since the beginning of 2013. She likes pugs and breasts.
Georgia Kriz

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