The Kitchen Chronicles

Salt

Salt of my life, you

Conceal the rancid moments

That besiege my steak.

 

Bacon

Sizzle my sweetness

With such tender arousal,

Dip me in thy oils.

 

Skillet

O skillet, you cook

My pig with such ardour. You

Serve thy purpose well.

 

Rockmelon

I long to grasp thee.

Your insides soft as rock, soon

Left with empty shell.

 

Passionfruit

My passion for you

Is like a firm passionfruit,

But riddled with seeds.

 

Mixing Spoon

Wooden mixing spoon,

With thee I make such sweet soup

Though time blackens thou.

 

Rolling Pin

My dear rolling pin,

With rhythm and strength divine

You flatten my love.

 

Onion

I cried all night with

Tears melting butterscotch, now

I have seen your heart.

 

Marmalade

With the morn I rise,

Sweet birds, melodies free, yet

Everywhere empty jars.

 

Rissole

Is that all she left

Me, simply one rissole on

A stove without fire?

 

Spice Rack

My rack confuses.

Revamp thy order. Where art

Thou oregano?

 

The Horned Melon

Love is such sweet pain.

On my tongue, my tastebuds weep

As you have punctured.

 

Soufflé

Soufflé in a dish

Rise in my fan-forced oven,

Yet only to fall.

 

Turkey

With my hand up your

Rectum, I rhythmically

Stuff with condiments.

 

Toaster Waffles

Searing in toaster

You burn to a crisp, so I

May gorge in delight.

Honi Soit
Honi Soit is the largest and oldest weekly student newspaper in Australia. Our articles, like this one, are made possible by our dedicated student reporters and contributors.
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