Comedy //

USU decides to incorporate identity politics into operations

The USU has hired a professional political correctness consultant in the aftermath of the (trigger warning: DEATH) “Day of the Dead” party scandal. According to Union sources, the consultant will be conducting a wide-scale review of the campus and its alignment with rampant and undiscerning political correctness. It’s expected that the consultant will rename several…

Comedy //

Strike coverage: local man finally bowls a turkey

A Strathfield man was yesterday celebrating his first ever turkey in a game of tenpin bowling. Garth Funkel, 23, achieved the feat at the North Strathfield AMF Bowling facility, mildly impressing co-workers forced by upper management to endure the so-called bonding exercise. A turkey is the term given to three strikes in a row in…

god is dead
Comedy //

Pope announces do whatever the fuck you want God doesn’t even exist

Following a string of unprecedented announcements over previous months by the newly instated Pope, from embracing gays within the Church to implying people of other faiths can still find their way into heaven, Pope Francis stunned the world this week with his frank admission that it really doesn’t matter what you do, because we’re all just spacedust sitting on a rock hurtling through an otherwise barren universe, and for all we know there might not even be a God.

Comedy //

Abbott not really an asshole

It was with utter elation and raw unfiltered emotion that Tony Abbott was presented with the news of Labor’s turnaround in asylum seeker policy under Prime Minister Rudd this week.

Comedy //

David Cameron’s Error 505

In a shock announcement following the implementation of mandatory filters on internet pornography in the UK, David Cameron has moved to ban the sale of Kleenex tissues and Vaseline to males under the age of 18.