BBC Cribs, the long-anticipated collaboration between MTV Cribs and BBC’s Grand Designs, premiered on BBC2 last Saturday to mixed reviews. Host Kevin McCloud (or McCloud Nine, as he is now known) aims to bring together both overly intellectual parents and their too-cool-for-school teens in the beautiful family bonding experience that is afternoon television.
The show, much like Grand Designs, follows the building of a multimillion-dollar house for a yuppie couple whose dream is to live in a house somewhat resembling the Teletubbies residence — but with a few MTV tweaks.
Instead of his signature droned narration, McCloud delivers a steady stream of slangy catchphrases. It’s hard to tell what audience McCloud is targeting with interjections like “Bro, these thatched roofs are bitchin’!” or “You’d be a straight up fool to not stan hard for this modernist design, fam.” While his narration communicates enough architectural knowledge to be somewhat relevant to the house being built, McCloud’s attempts to insert witty, trendy dialogue creates confusion as to whether he is talking about a house or a one night stand.
The show also seems to take some further creative inspiration from another MTV staple, Pimp My Ride. In attempts to make a state-of-the-art house in the middle of nowhere even more useless, McCloud and the “BBC Boyz” install a ridiculous number of luxury items, including a SodaStream pool, gold-plated windows and a doorbell that plays DMX’s “X Gon Give It To Ya”.
It’s hard to tell whether BBC Cribs will continue into further seasons. McCloud has expressed his enthusiasm, saying it was a great way to connect to his children (who are presumably mad that he spends his life with families looking to upgrade their residence). Whilst he has the know how to maintain some integrity, younger viewers will undoubtedly be wondering, “Who the fuck is this British dude and why is he dry humping that fountain?”