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Deputy Vice Interim Assistant Associate Honourary Chancellor (Naval Warfare) resigns

We're just as confused as you are.

The Deputy Vice Interim Assistant Associate Honourary Chancellor (Naval Warfare) has announced his intention to resign.

Upon hearing the news, everyone from university management to the broader student body questioned who this man was, why should we care, and what have you done for me lately.

Even though no one’s really interested, Doorman Ivermectin, the Deputy Vice Interim Assistant Associate Honourary Chancellor (Naval Warfare), said he was resigning for health reasons and that he wished to spend time with his wife.

The University has suggested that they will not be recruiting a replacement as they didn’t realise they the position existed in the first place.

“There will be no international recruitment drive or an internal search. We didn’t even realise he was on the payroll till he told us he was going.”

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