WARNING: bodily fluids, monster dildos, and boys who believe a peek at your breasts will heal them from the perils of climate change and capitalism.
Originally produced by SUDS at the University of Sydney, Screwd! has made its way into the limelight, playing 4 epic nights at Flight Path Theatre from September 4-7. A highlight of the Sydney Fringe Festival, Screwd!, written by the ultra-talented Eloise Aiken and Mariika Mehigan, delivers a hilariously provocative critique of patriarchy and feminism, asking audiences why we downplay problematic male behaviour simply because it makes us laugh.
Closeted lesbian and sharp-witted Frankie (Georgia Gray Spencer) must navigate the trials and tribulations of Year 12 with her four friends, Olivia (Parisa Bell-Mir), Lux (Jessica Garnett), Perla (Leatitia Opie), and Charlie (Mitchell Dihm) who have remained under the spell of mediocre sex by their self-righteous and entitled boyfriends all year.
Frankie is fed up. To her right, Olivia — the love of her life — is getting fucked (over) by a self-proclaimed cheater (Patrick Fuccilli) while Lux is stuck reading pretentious poetry by a philosophy bro who misuses “Orwellian” at every turn (Sophie Newby). To her left, Perla is cuddling a moron with a 9-inch penis (Mali Lung) while Charlie endures homophobic slurs from the guy he’s hooking up with (Isaac Coombes). Whatever will Frankie do?
Mr. Felton (Daisy Semmler), their English and Sex-ed teacher who loves hot yoga, dick, and reminding Frankie of her lesbianism, teaches the class about the ancient Greek comedy Lysistrata. In the comic play, women deny men sex to end the Peloponnesian war, leveraging men’s deepest desire against them. Inspired, Frankie, beaming and wide-eyed, proposes a modern twist: a sex strike! She urges her dissatisfied friends to seduce and deny their dirtbag boyfriends of their prized bodies, “for the betterment of womankind.”
The strike works…at first. The group reclaims their bodies and discovers the transcendent power of a vibrator, which unlike the conceited boys of St Beaberton’s college, makes them finish. They have a grand time sending nudes and teasing their boyfriends with mind-bending dirty talk, just to deny them the one thing they desperately needed:“sex, sex and more sex.”
But of course, they’re not going to get away with it. Denying their boyfriends sex is insanity. As the boys hatch a plan with their single combined brain cell, the entire theatre can feel the sexual frustration emanating from their deprived bodies. Their goal? To out-manoeuvre this ludicrous sex strike before formal, the horniest night of the year. Harry (Lung) whips out Sally Rooney’s Normal People, while Coxy (Fuccilli) plays smut audios narrated by Andrew Scott: tastefully satirising modern standards, while the boys realise, wait, maybe we should try treating our partners with respect.
The kicker was the exuberantly sexy Magic Mike style dance to Lady Gaga that had the audience laughing for 5 minutes. What’s hotter than attempting to break dance on a table?
But Frankie sees through the charade for what it truly is: a grand illusion designed to reclaim the hearts (and bodies) of their partners. With a steely gaze, Frankie surveys the theatre, eyes boring into every member of the audience with disappointment. She questions “why are you laughing?” For the audience is not a passive observer, but a mirror and affirmation of how men’s narcissism is excused when it happens to be charming or entertaining: a subtle but powerful commentary that challenges us to confront our own complicity.
Ultimately, the group realises they deserve better, despite Frankie being a little overbearing. Queue the banger from Charlie: “David you’re a pussy, and I like dick.”
Screwd! is masterfully witty, flawlessly acted and hilariously confronting. Don’t open your mouth too wide to laugh to avoid any surprises coming inside.
