This week, top Australian psychologist pest Bettina Arndt was outraged to find out that Griffith University had released a list of dating tips including “you have the right to say no to a date”. The Rodent invited Arndt to share her own dating tips for students.
- Too many students are chasing skinny Timothée Chalamet looking twinks these days! Little wonder they’re unlucky in love. Ladies, find yourself a man you know could easily physically overpower and kill you, then bask in his mercy of choosing not to.
- Sydney Uni hipsters are obsessed with their incestuous “polycules”. Shame! Young people need to get back to traditional marriage: a loving bond between a wife, husband and his secret sexy secretary.
- This one’s for the Women’s skankz, yo! If you want to nab yourself a Paul’s boy try what they’ve been doing for years: roofies! He’ll be falling (and vomiting) over you in no time.
- Always remember to clean the sand out of your crusty pussy. I learnt too late :’(.
- Unimpressive person? Are you Not in Education, Employment, or Training? Don’t be afraid to make shit up and lie to your root.
